First Grade: Be Assertive

For our final lesson in this unit, we focused on our fourth Skill for Learning: being assertive, or asking for help in a calm, firm, respectful way. We began the lesson with a quick review of what skills we had already learned: focus attention, listen, and use self-talk. Next, we learned a new way to share our ideas called Think, Turn, Tell. In this activity, students think of an answer, then show me a silent signal when they are ready to share (thumbs up). Next, I tell students to turn and tell their partner their ideas. When both partners have shared, they give me the silent signal (thumbs up) and I know they are ready to move on. Puppy and Snail came to visit, and Snail told students about how he had forgotten his lunch on the school bus. He was afraid to tell the teacher, but Puppy reminded him that the teacher is here to help.

Next, we talked about a girl named Tiffany, who was working on a writing assignment but was stuck. The teacher was busy helping another student across the room. We used Think, Turn, Tell to share our ideas about what Tiffany could do (try one more time, ask a friend, raise her hand and wait for the teacher). We talked about what we should do when we have a problem in a very specific order.

1. Try one more time
2. Ask a friend
3. Raise your hand and wait for the teacher

We talked about why we should try one more time and ask a friend before asking the teacher, and what would happen if we all asked the teacher for help every time. Next, we talked about three different ways to ask for help: passive, aggressive, and assertive. Snail modeled each one:

• Passive -- whiny, not making eye contact
• Aggressive -- bossy, mean, yelling
• Assertive -- calm, firm, respectful

We talked about what was wrong with asking for help in a passive or aggressive way, and what was right about asking for help in an assertive way. We ended the lesson by having students practice asking for help assertively.

How to Ask for Help Assertively

1. Say Excuse Me
2. Say the Problem
3. Ask for Help